Empaths are meant to be mirrors of energy, not sponges. As a compassionate helper, you have different spiritual potentials or paths within your own field of work. For example, you may explore creativity, personal truth, integrity or like myself, a path of expression. No matter what your destiny is, you are here to heal not only yourself but also others through your unique method. It doesn’t matter if you do this through writing, being a psychotherapist, medium, coach or nurse, as long as you are learning and growing, according to your life path.
Your life path will be your greatest joy and your biggest challenge. For example, I have encountered people who try to repress or control my personal expression. This occurs when someone is blocked and does not have a desire to grow in their own healthy expression. When I was younger, I absorbed their negativity and felt guilty for speaking up. Through years of healing and personal work, I understand the majority of this energy is their guilt and shame transferred onto me. Knowing this, I now mirror or reflect that energy back.
A Fun House of Mirrors
We all project our thoughts, feelings and ideas into the space around us. This makes you wonder; do I really see people as they are or how I want to see them?
The world of our ego wants to divide, keep people separate, have enemies and keep us all stuck in this illusion. This force seeks to control your environment and all the people in it. You think what you perceive is reality but it is so much more. Look beyond the surface and get to the real story, about ourselves and others.
The Mirror Works Both Ways
Most people don’t like the status quo to be challenged, even us empaths. There are times someone’s insecurity, fears, doubts and powerlessness sticks to your energy field. This is when you need to look at yourself and ask; are they mirroring back to me?
When you feel secure and are standing in your power, you will not feel a pull. If you feel a twinge in your gut or an annoyed feeling, it is sign you have work to do in this area. We are never finished projects, look for opportunities to grow and be grateful when this experience appears for you.
How to Mirror
- Become a witness and observe. Do not take what others say or do personally. Through mindfulness, which is the practice of being in the present moment, you will detach and see clearly. You may have an A-HA! moment saying to yourself, “This is your block, not mine.” When you are not affected, this is very easy to understand. Everyone on this planet needs lots of practice in this area.
- Learn about your life path. Self-awareness is essential for empaths. When you know who you are, your strengths and blind spots, you can recognize what is your psychological stuff and what is others. I highly recommend this book and have utilized it for over fifteen years, in my private practice. It accurately identifies, based on your date of birth, what, on a soul level, you came into this lifetime to achieve. The Secret Language of Destiny: A Complete Personology Guide to Finding Your Life Purpose by Gary Goldschneider and Joost Elffers
- Heal your issues. Where you are wounded, you attach to others pain and take it on as your own. Do not avoid what you feel. Learn how to be strong in your energy, despite feeling triggered. For myself, I needed to learn communication, assertiveness skills and self -esteem. When I express assertively, it may cause a reaction in someone else, but I know I am in the clear.
You may not mirror back perfectly. Often you do not have to say a word, it is best not to. Verbal mirroring is best kept to the psychotherapist office or coaching session. If you feel you must speak. Ask someone if he or she is open to feedback. You can simply say; Are you open to some feedback? If they are not looking for feedback, do an energetic mirroring with steps one through three above.
When you drop the scripts and stories in your head, you see a larger purpose. If someone else can’t see their illusions and projections, remember to detach from other people’s stuff. This is their karma not yours.
Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach who helps sensitive souls not just survive but shine. She is the Amazon bestselling author of I Fill My Cup: A Journal for Compassionate Helpers and the kindle book Setting Ethical Limits for Caring & Competent Professionals. Get a FREE 10 page E-book; 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now at http://www.lisahutchison.net