How to Find Pain Relief Through your Mind

How to find pain relief through your mind

When you are in a state of suffering and distress, it is difficult to be peaceful, spiritual and at ease, yet this is the place you long to be in. I know because I have experience with chronic pain and illness.

I have enjoyed many months with little to no pain by working on myself emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. When I began to have chronic pain issues, nine years ago, I never thought I could have a day without pain. I tried several different medications but decided to live without them because I could not tolerate the side effects being a sensitive person.

You look healthy!

As a child, I hid my pain from others. I felt responsible, being an empath, for everyone’s emotional well being. I often wore a smile and focused on those around me, ignoring my own needs. From the outside, I looked healthy, yet within I carried hidden pain. The saying, “you never know what someone is going through,” is true for someone who lives with chronic pain and invisible illness.

Today

Now, I express my pain in healthy ways, in order to take care of myself.  I let others know what I am going through when I need to withdraw temporarily in order to heal myself. Pain has brought me a more spiritual life. I cry out to God, the angels and spiritual helpers, while I surrender to their love and guidance

I write as part of my healing. Recently, I had a flare up of two sites at once. At first, I thought; what did I do wrong? I realized with any chronic condition you will experience cycles of relapse and remission.

Working with the pain

Acceptance- Be where you are. Trying to escape pain does not work because it is with you and focusing on the pain intensifies it because you are teaching your brain to think about the sensation. If it is not severe, you can distract from it temporarily.

There are times the answer lies in acceptance. Accept the hopeless feeling and sit with it. As you focus on your slow, rhythmic breathing, say to yourself, “I feel stuck right now, I feel hopeless, I don’t know what to do.” People are resistant to use the word hopeless because they have a fear of getting stuck in it. You need to admit where you are, in order to surrender and move through it. It is when you resist or deny feelings, you get stuck.

Remember there is hope even when you do not feel it. Know you can keep going and you are not alone. There are answers for you even if  you haven’t found them yet.

Be gentle with yourself. When you see someone you love in a vulnerable state you give them gentle loving care, why not yourself? You are just as valuable and worthy. Soften your voice, speak kindly and hold a space for yourself. When you experience a rough day, keep your schedule light.

Employ self-care. What does self-care mean for you?  It can be a favorite cup of tea, a warm blanket, soft music and/or a scented candle.

Exercise. If your doctor recommends exercise, do it. A gentle walk can help some forms of pain. When you circulate the blood and connect with nature, it supports the healing process.

Rest. There is great power in being. A lot of healing takes place with restorative sleep, meditation and mindfulness. Pain is an exhausting experience, it drains your energy. Make time to rest.

Find a therapist. You will want a psychotherapist who is compassionate about your health but also will challenge you to think and act differently. Cognitive behavioral therapy works specifically with your thoughts and behaviors. This type of treatment helps you change your thinking about the pain sensation and has been highly effective with pain management.

In closing

We all suffer pain at some point in our lives whether it is mental, physical or spiritual. It is human nature to want to avoid pain, yet pain can teach you something valuable about yourself. It is up to you to discover that meaning and a therapist can help you with this process. The next time you feel pain, work with your body but do not forget your mind. Your mind is much more powerful than any of us know or believe.

I highly recommend this book to help you through your journey, it has helped me through mine. The 12 Stages of Healing by Donald M. Epstein D.C. In it, the author teaches breathing exercises and affirmations for each stage of healing from suffering through reclaiming your power. Buy it here on Amazon. 

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Her specialty is working with professionals who get drained from their helping efforts, recharge and renew their energy. If you would like to learn more about Lisa and her practice visit www.lisahutchison.net and pick up your FREE 10 page e-book called 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! 

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5 Ways to Release Relationship Expectations and Be Happy!

5 Ways to Release Relationship Expectations and Be Happy! (2)

Life is full of changes. It is your choice whether to resist or accept them. Holding onto the way things “should be done” or having expectations drains you of precious energy. The most difficult yet loving act can be letting go.

During the holidays, I faced change within my own family. At first, I felt hurt, disappointed, sad and angry. All of these feelings are valid, yet some of these were rooted in my childhood. After I fully sat with these feelings, I was able to release them and appreciate that the holidays can be different from what I have previously experienced.

5 Ways to Release Expectations

  1. Watch for signs of change- I began to notice changes in my family about two years ago. Change rarely happens out of the blue but rather over a period of time in small increments. People begin to have different experiences from one another and grow apart. This is normal and okay. We are all discovering our own spiritual growth and path. The problems begin when you deny what you see because of a fear of change.
  2. Let go of fear- When you are resisting or trying to control the experience, it doesn’t feel good. Let go and let God. Healing happens when you release because you allow spirit to enter the situation and your life. You may even be able to find some positives in change.
  3. Let go of control- Allow people to be who they are and do what they want, this gives you and them freedom and peace. I am pretty good at this because I was the one in my family growing up wanting events to be different. When I was forced to do things in order to make other people happy, I felt resentful and withdrew. No one wants that kind of energy at their event.
  4. Let go of expectations- See people for who they are, not what you want them to be. People will show and tell you what they want and who they are, if you listen. Be open to seeing what is and drop any illusions you have about this person and the relationship.
  5. Define what you want- Change gives you an opportunity to focus on what is important to you. For the holidays and other future events, I want to send everyone an energy of appreciation and acknowledgement. An event isn’t about pleasing one person, but rather thinking of the entire group who are coming together to celebrate. There are no perfect solutions but there are ways to compromise and let go for the highest good.

No matter what your relationship, keep your eyes open to the signs of change. Allow change to flow and be open to the possibility that something different could be better than you expect. No matter what happens, you can choose love and this is how you will be happy.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Her specialty is working with professionals who get drained from their helping efforts, recharge and renew their energy. If you would like to learn more about Lisa and her practice visit www.lisahutchison.net and pick up your FREE 10 page e-book called 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! 

5 Benefits of Meditation that Restore Your Energy

“Our world needs more time to wonder and reflect but there is too much fast paced constant distraction.” – Mister Rogers.
 

We live in a complex world with a lot of stimuli flooding our senses each and every day. It is easy to get caught up in the whirl of activity around and within you. For empaths and HSP (highly sensitive people), the feeling of overwhelm can engulf you due to your ability to absorb energy from the people, places and things around you.

Here are 5 specific ways meditation restores your energy

  1. Reduces Stress– The act of focusing your mind, relaxes your entire mind-body-spirit system. When you meditate, you decrease stress hormones called epinephrine and cortisol. These hormones are activated by a part of your brain known as the amygdala. It is this part of your brain that reacts to stress and trauma causing you to go into a fight, flight or freeze response. In an eight week study (2011), Lazar found the amygdala got smaller through meditation and mindfulness. The participants reported spending an average of 27 minutes each day practicing mindfulness exercises. 
  2. Calms Racing Thoughts– When you observe your bodily sensations and the stimuli around you, it slows the thoughts. One 2013 research study called Mindfulness Training Improves Working Memory Capacity and GRE Performance While Reducing Mind Wandering found that just a couple of weeks of meditation training helped people’s focus and memory during the verbal reasoning section of the graduate record examination (GRE).
  3. Increases Your Patience Meditation may increase your empathy for others. By consciously focusing on your breath, you learn detachment. Detachment or letting go naturally gives you more patience as you become more responsive rather than reactive. In a 2011 study Loving-Kindness and Compassion Meditation: Potential for Psychological Interventions  It is hypothesized that “loving kindness meditation may be particularly useful for targeting interpersonal problems such as anger control issues, whereas both compassion meditation and loving kindness meditation be particularly useful for treating relationship problems, such as marital conflicts, or counteracting the challenges among care giving professions or nonprofessionals who must provide long-term care to a relative or friend.” 
  4. Maintains a Mind-Body Connection– When you slow your breathing down it can sync up your mind and body. In a 2016 study called Entrainment of chaotic activities in brain and heart during MBSR mindfulness training it was found  “the chaotic activities of the brain and the heart became more coordinated during Mindfulness-Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) training, suggesting that mindfulness training may increase the entrainment between mind and body.” 
  5. Improves your Sleep– Your body and mind become more relaxed through a meditation practice which can help you let go, release and get a better quality of sleep. In April 2015 a study called Mindfulness Meditation and Improvement in Sleep Quality and Daytime Impairment among Older Adults with Sleep Disturbances was published.  It was found that those in the mindfulness group had less insomnia, fatigue, and depression at the end of the six sessions than those in the sleep education group only. 

My story

Meditation has saved my sanity as an empath. It not only has helped me let go of other people’s energy but also reconnects me to my soul. Without meditation, I am impatient, anxious, overwhelmed and more easily focused on the negatives of life. When I slow down, relax the body and release excess energy, I feel at peace, rejuvenated and myself again.

I am honored to have written, recorded and created an MP3 recording just for compassionate professionals like you called Renew and Heal: Releasing the Chaos Meditation.

I know how difficult it can be to let go of the craziness around you when you care so deeply. This energy of stress gets absorbed deep within your system causing fatigue, irritability and impatience. Now more than ever compassionate souls are being called to stay centered and grounded despite the chaos of our daily world and life.

I invite you to purchase your copy today here: Renew & Heal Meditation Releasing the Chaos 

Be as good to yourself as you are to others!

Renew & Heal Meditation-Releasing the Chaos

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Her specialty is working with professionals who get drained from their helping efforts, recharge and renew their energy. If you would like to learn more about Lisa and her practice visit www.lisahutchison.net and pick up your FREE 10 page e-book called 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! 

How to forgive those who emotionally reject you

How to Forgive Those Who Emotionally Reject You

I have wanted to write about empaths and narcissists yet I didn’t know where to start. As with all writer’s block, I was overwhelmed with the subject matter because I have too much information and experience with this. One night after a dream, this blog post came together.

People who have narcissistic and/or borderline traits often give silent treatments and invalidate others. Those with narcissistic traits use these tactics as a way to control and manipulate to gain a sense of power. While those with borderline traits use these tactics out of a fear of being abandoned or rejected by others. They want to reject you before you reject them.

My experience

I grew up believing that rejection was a part of love, after all that is how I lived. I often received silent treatments and invalidation from male family members. At first, I felt hurt until I realized it was a good thing because I did not have to listen to negativity any longer.

Avoiding a pattern does not heal it. These energies translated into my early dating experiences. I attracted boyfriends who were hot and then ice cold to me. I often felt confused and attracted to them more because of this ambivalence. Luckily, I broke free from this before meeting my husband, although I have seen it a few more times through friendships and work relationships.

How to break free for good! 

#1 Become aware. Love is not painful, invalidating or rejecting. Educate yourself, talk to a therapy professional and see the reality of the relationship. One problem is if you live in a fantasy of what you want for the relationship vs. what it truly is. Write down these differences in a journal; what my relationship is and what I want. This exercise will help you gain clarity about your situation.

When others ignore, reject or invalidate you, it is a reflection of them, not you. Loving people do not go around hurting others. A loving energy wants to keep connections open, build others up and be a healing force in this world.

#2  Express Gratitude. Be thankful for the lessons learned. When you see how you have grown, you can choose to no longer repeat the pattern through other relationships.

#3 Forgive. Forgiveness is for your own inner peace and healing.  It in no way excuses inexcusable behavior. These types of relationships and wounds are difficult, be gentle with yourself and give yourself time to process.

Here is a healing statement combining how  #2 and #3 work together:

Thank you for teaching me that silent treatments, rejections and invalidations are NOT love. I now choose to forgive ___________________(insert name) and release you into the light. I NOW attract healthy, loving relationships.

You may need to repeat and write this several times to connect your logical mind to your feeling mind. When you feel the tears, let them flow and experience a sense of peace inside of yourself. You are done.

You may also want to read these additional blogs:

Are you making up stories?

How to Recognize Manipulation & Protect Your Energy 

How to Successfully Deal with Passive Aggressive Behavior

Lisa Hutchison LMHC works specifically with sensitive healers who want to recharge and refuel their energies from challenging relationships such as these through phone counseling and angel card readings.

I will address your specific situation as we come up with a step by step plan to empower you for a future interaction. The more you step into your power, you will deal more successfully with this type of relationship dynamic without getting drained. To break free from the chaos of relationship dynamics go to www.lisahutchison.net and help yourself to 8 Simple Things that Release Chaos from your Life Now!

 

 

Why connection is important in today’s world

Why Connection is Important in Today's World

 

I have been more contemplative since the rally in Charlottesville VA, the death of 32-year-old Heather Heyer and now the flooding in Texas. I desire to connect more authentically with others yet struggle because I do not want to get drained by extreme anger, violence or anguish. Being a part of protests, rallies and marches are not for me because of this. Yet as an empath, I want to know more than what’s up; social niceties and small talk bore me.

I have come to a new acceptance that I am called to heal this world in a different way. This has been the story of my life, stepping out on my own to follow a path unknown. Instead of donating to the Red Cross for the Texas floods, I donated to a smaller company called Undies for Everyone which supplies clean underwear to the survivors of the flood. I connect with being a woman and needing clean underwear more than donating to a large organization.

Three Men, a child and a baby

I am overtaken by a lot of thoughts, after these events. Walking helps me process this energy. One day, I saw a man wheeling a stroller with a small child lagging behind him. As we entered the cross walk at the same time from different directions, I moved slightly outside of the white line for his young child to be in the cross walk. We smiled as we passed one another. I went into the post office, mailed a few letters and another man held the door open for me. I thanked him and held it for him in return.

As I walked home, I saw the same man who walked with his children. This time I noticed the drained looked upon his face as he folded and put the stroller back into his car. We smiled again but this time I said, “Have a good day.” In this moment, I witnessed an energy shift and his face brightened. Intuitively, I knew I gave him a gift and felt authentically connected. Lastly, another man mowing his lawn waved at me, I waved in return. After my interactions with these three men, I felt rejuvenated, hopeful and inspired to write.

We are one

We all need reminders in our struggles that we are cared for and not alone. When you connect to a person’s heart and soul, you recognize them as the Divine light we all are. These small acts of kindness are best if not planned. Don’t worry, intuitively you will know who to connect with, where to donate and what to do. When you allow spirit to work through you, you are guided. Trust you will be in the right place with the right people at the right time.

When you notice someone who needs an emotional lift, look them in the eye and speak from your heart. It can be something simple such as have a good day, a wave or a smile. Now more than ever we need reassurance that we are not one another’s enemies. This year we all have experienced heavy intense energies. The best way to cope is to shine your light as a channel for Divine love.

I would love to hear your thoughts in the comment section of how you authentically connect with others despite the extreme anger, violence and fear that is a part of our society today.

For specific ways to prevent your own energy depletion, contact Lisa Hutchison LMHC. She offers counseling and angel card readings by phone and in person to teach you how to rejuvenate and recharge your unique energy issues. I invite you to go to my website http://www.lisahutchison.net and pick up this FREE 10 page E-book 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now! 

6 Ways to Reconnect to the Body & Feel Secure

6 Ways to Reconnect to the Body & Feel Secure

Each morning when you awaken, you receive energy from the Divine. Throughout the day, you become drained through energy leaks which give your power away. Energy leaks can occur from many causes; some are illness, over thinking, not saying no to others and even having too much clutter. When these happen, it is easy for an empath to get disconnected from her body, mind and spirit.

You achieve natural stress reduction and energy renewal when connected to the body, allowing any excess energy to pass through you. Grounding connects your energy to Mother Earth, a natural stabilizing force. Think of a lightening rod as a metaphor for grounding your energy. Lightning rods are made out of metal and are good conductors of electricity. When lightning strikes the rod, energy flows freely without resistance into the ground.

Empaths attract and absorb energy from others due to having a sensitive nature. One of your lessons is to learn how to allow energy to pass through you without getting attached to it, much like the lightening rod. When you can remain grounded or reconnect to the body shortly after feeling depleted of energy, you create mental and physical stability within. This naturally decreases anxiety, depression and insomnia.

How to reconnect to your physical body

1.) Connect to your breath- Remember to breathe! Often under times of stress, people hold their breath. Notice your breath right now. Is it shallow or deep? Focus on sending your breath into your lower abdomen, let it go and allow your body to relax.

2.) Relax the physical body- This can be done through meditation and visualization. Busy minds often benefit from guided meditations led by others. Also take a bath or shower and add sea salt to the water because this grounds you, releases the stress of the day, and any energy you may have absorbed from others.

3.) Practice sensory activities- Use the 5 senses to direct your attention into the present moment. Right now; What sounds do you hear? What does the room temperature feel like upon your skin? What do you see and taste? Smell your favorite scent.

4.) Get out into nature- Connect with the outdoors. Breathe fresh air, put your feet in some grass or sand, and watch the animals and birds. Hug a tree and create a picture in your mind of the root structure going deep into the ground.

5.) Eat some protein and or root vegetables- For those who eat meat, do so. For vegetarians and others choose vegetables that grow deep within the earth. Potatoes, carrots and yams have the energy of grounding within each of their cells.  When you eat these foods, it gives your body an unconscious signal to ground.

6.) Get an energy session- Reiki can be useful to clear your chakras and release other’s energy while grounding your body to the Earth.

For specific ways to prevent your own energy depletion, contact Lisa Hutchison LMHC. She offers counseling and angel card readings by phone and in person to teach you how to rejuvenate and recharge your unique energy issues. Go to her website http://www.lisahutchison.net and pick up this FREE 10 page E-book 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now! 

 

How to receive help when you’re a helper

How to Receive Help when You're a Helper (1)

 

I don’t know about you, I find it very difficult to ask for help. I have a strong ego that says, “I will do it myself.” My entire life I have taken pride in my independence. I know there are times that I could have saved myself a lot of time and energy if I asked for help. Now that my business is growing and I want to maintain my energy levels, I am asking for help more and more.

As a psychotherapist, I often guide my clients to ask for help. Do you notice as a helper it is almost as if you need permission to do so? We often reassure one another. It is okay to rest. It is okay to do less. It is okay to ask for help at work and at home. You don’t need anyone’s permission because you already are deserving and worthy of help.  

Where does the block to receiving help start?

You were born with an independent streak. You have an independent personality.  I remember being a small child wanting a teddy bear that was in the crib. Rather than ask for help, I reached my little arm through the bar and tried to get the bear out myself. If I remember correctly my arm got stuck!

You don’t want to be a burden or bother others. You have heard in the past a negative response when you asked for help or were manipulated with guilt. As an empath, you sense and know others are experiencing overwhelm and stress. Due to this awareness, you avoid speaking up and asserting your needs.

A fear of rejection. When you get the courage to ask for help, you feel vulnerable and sensitive with your ego. You imagine someone saying “no” as the worst case scenario. Do not give the word “no” so much power. It is okay if someone can not help you. There are a lot of other people out there in the world that can. To take the sting out of no, say, “Who can I ask next?”

You enjoy being the helper, not the one being helped. Some people attribute negative thoughts or feelings to needing help. You may think you are weak for needing help. It is a sign of strength to reach out and ask for help. There will be a time for each and every one of us when we need a little help from our friends.

How to ask for help

Know the signs of needing help. A good sign you need help is when you feel overwhelmed, tense and your energy is depleting. When this happens, think of the people who are in your circle. Who are the ones that offer the kind of help you need?

Pray to the Divine. Ask for a person with integrity to help you with your current situation and trust the Divine has brought him or her into your life. When this person arrives, give thanks and pay attention to the advice that is given. Remember you are never alone.

Ask! One benefit of asking for help is when others are not personally involved in your situation, they can offer unique solutions that you have not thought about. In order to receive, you have to start asking others for help and there is no perfect way to do it. You are going to have to learn how to ask while feeling uncomfortable because it isn’t natural for helpers to seek outside help. When someone says no, keep asking until you get the help you need.

The more specific you can be in your request, the better you can receive help. When you are able to be clear, people can understand your situation better. Be flexible and open, because sometimes a person can not help you as you requested but can help you in other ways. There were a few times I received a healing, I didn’t get what I wanted yet I got what I needed.

For more support and help contact Lisa. 

Lisa Hutchison LMHC works for empathic healers who feel drained after their helping efforts, refill and recharge their energy with psychotherapy, intuitive coaching and angel card readings. For more information visit her website at www.lisahutchison.net, while you are there get this FREE gift: 8 Simple Things that Release Chaos from Your Life Now!