5 Ways to Release Relationship Expectations and Be Happy!

5 Ways to Release Relationship Expectations and Be Happy! (2)

Life is full of changes. It is your choice whether to resist or accept them. Holding onto the way things “should be done” or having expectations drains you of precious energy. The most difficult yet loving act can be letting go.

During the holidays, I faced change within my own family. At first, I felt hurt, disappointed, sad and angry. All of these feelings are valid, yet some of these were rooted in my childhood. After I fully sat with these feelings, I was able to release them and appreciate that the holidays can be different from what I have previously experienced.

5 Ways to Release Expectations

  1. Watch for signs of change- I began to notice changes in my family about two years ago. Change rarely happens out of the blue but rather over a period of time in small increments. People begin to have different experiences from one another and grow apart. This is normal and okay. We are all discovering our own spiritual growth and path. The problems begin when you deny what you see because of a fear of change.
  2. Let go of fear- When you are resisting or trying to control the experience, it doesn’t feel good. Let go and let God. Healing happens when you release because you allow spirit to enter the situation and your life. You may even be able to find some positives in change.
  3. Let go of control- Allow people to be who they are and do what they want, this gives you and them freedom and peace. I am pretty good at this because I was the one in my family growing up wanting events to be different. When I was forced to do things in order to make other people happy, I felt resentful and withdrew. No one wants that kind of energy at their event.
  4. Let go of expectations- See people for who they are, not what you want them to be. People will show and tell you what they want and who they are, if you listen. Be open to seeing what is and drop any illusions you have about this person and the relationship.
  5. Define what you want- Change gives you an opportunity to focus on what is important to you. For the holidays and other future events, I want to send everyone an energy of appreciation and acknowledgement. An event isn’t about pleasing one person, but rather thinking of the entire group who are coming together to celebrate. There are no perfect solutions but there are ways to compromise and let go for the highest good.

No matter what your relationship, keep your eyes open to the signs of change. Allow change to flow and be open to the possibility that something different could be better than you expect. No matter what happens, you can choose love and this is how you will be happy.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Her specialty is working with professionals who get drained from their helping efforts, recharge and renew their energy. If you would like to learn more about Lisa and her practice visit www.lisahutchison.net and pick up your FREE 10 page e-book called 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! 


22 thoughts on “5 Ways to Release Relationship Expectations and Be Happy!

  1. Letting go of control and expectations was a very big and hard lesson for me to learn and I have found that my sense of appreciation ‘what is’ has grown tremendously when I can do that. Relationships are one of the best ways to push us to grow and become more loving and joyful, even when we go through the growth kicking and screaming 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Such an important blog Lisa. Change is constant in our lives and adjusting gracefully is an ongoing challenge. I really appreciate the line, “Allow change to flow and be open to the possibility that something different could be better than you expect.” Things are changing with my aging mother and holding open the possibility that something different could be better than I expect is encouraging and hopeful. Thank you so much!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you Kelley. It is difficult to witness a Mom’s change in her health. I have been there, my heart goes out to you as you navigate through these transitions. You are welcome and I hold you and your Mom in the light.


  3. While I did a pretty good job through the holidays, this is an ongoing effort for me. I particularly struggle with defining what I want. I plan to do less grumbling and more letting go in the coming year. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wise words Lisa, and yes, often we put our own energy of emotional attachment into situations, and wound ourselves unnecessarily.
    Learning to step back as you did and review the situation again, is something many of us forget to do.
    Letting go of expectations Very wise, and learning to stop wanting to control situations, as we learn to explore life in the flow more..
    A wonderful read to begin my New Year with Lisa.. Thank you for your inspiration.. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  5. “No matter what happens, you can choose love and this is how you will be happy.” At the end of the day this is all that matters. Choosing to walk in Love. Thank you for sharing Lisa

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Thank you for sharing your 5 excellent tips to release relationship expectations LIsa. Letting go of expectations and control is essential. Letting go of fear is a big one for all of us, as we have layers of ‘stuff’ – it’s like peeling an onion for a lifetime. Patience young Jedi’s of Love!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Life is an amazing adventure and most certainly full of changes. Some changes are welcomed, and some break even the strongest of hearts. Our reaction is a choice, and I agree – “No matter what happens, you can choose love and this is how you will be happy.”

    Thanks for sharing your pearls of wisdom, Lisa.

    Liked by 1 person

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