How to Walk Through Grief with Grace

I woke up on the seventh anniversary of my Mom’s death, feeling depressed. Each year is different, some are a mere hiccup while others feel more intense. It has been awhile since an anniversary has hit me this hard.

This year and summer have been rocky for me. A good friend of mine died in February, I let go of many relationships, which no longer resonated with me and many family relationship dynamics have shifted.

Today, I decided to be by the water. I have found great solace at the beach in the past and knew it would help me shift into a different energy. One of my favorite places to walk is The Grace Trail in Plymouth, Massachusetts.

Finding Grace in Grief

I have walked the Grace Trail many times. It is a meditative walk that asks five questions along the journey. Grace Trail was created by Anne Jolles to help her cope with the personal challenges and struggle of having a son in combat in Afghanistan. Since then it has helped thousands of people. I will share each stop with you so you can virtually travel through this blog and answer each question in your own mind.

What am I Grateful For?

At the beginning of the trail, I start with a past and present gratitude. I am grateful to have witnessed the miracle of my Mom moving her thumb after a severe stroke because not many people get to witness a miracle like that. You can read more about the marvel of a single movement in this article from Reader’s Digest called 7 Miraculous Stories About the Power of Healing Prayers . Coming back to this moment, I took a page from my Mom and stated, “I am grateful to be alive today.”

What do I need to Release?

A way down the trail, I find release. I let go of life needing to be a certain way. If 2018 has taught me anything, it is this. There is a higher plan at work, even when you do not see it yet. The Serenity Prayer is a great tool to aid in releasing what you cannot control.

Serenity Prayer – Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971)

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

 

What is calling out for Acceptance?

Walking up a short hill, I come upon acceptance. I accept life as it is and remember everything is as it is meant to be, even if I don’t understand it in this moment.

What is my next Challenge?

Walking down the hill and coming back around, I find challenge. I thought of a couple of challenges or places I am growing. The one which steps me most outside of my comfort zone is self-publishing and more public speaking.

What can I Embrace as possible?

Moving forward with confidence in my step, I embrace. I fully take in this present moment, trusting all is as it needs to be.

Feel free to share your journey through this blog in the comment section below.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. She specializes in working with professionals who get drained from their helping efforts, refill and recharge their energies. Get her FREE gift 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now! at http://www.lisahutchison.net

Here are some additional resources about the Grace Trail:

You can walk the trail anywhere, anytime, with anyone by just showing up and asking the questions shared in this book.  Buy it here at Amazon

Grace Trail® Hope Cards: 57 cards to wake up your life! 150 questions worth asking, plus beautiful images to nourish your curiosity and provide encouragement. Buy them at Amazon here!

Lisa Hutchison is a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program. She receives a small payment from Amazon when you purchase through these links- at no additional cost to you. Thanks!

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Why Angels are Important in the Manifestation Process

Growing up, my Mom told me everyone has a guardian angel. This angel is with you since birth helping you throughout your life. It was 20 years ago, I bought my first angel card oracle deck. I had a tarot deck, animal oracle cards and rune cards yet I preferred my connection to the angels. I found them to be gentle and direct with their guidance, which is the perfect combination for an empath like me. From there, I bought thirteen angel card decks, a mediumship card deck and a goddess oracle card deck.

The angels have helped manifest many goals and intentions. They guided me to release what blocked my progress and where to increase my energy. I have found angels can help with anything, from the mundane areas of life to the most important. Your only limitation is your own mind because any area of life is a possibility for growth. All you have to do is ask!

Here are some specific areas angels help with the manifestation process, remember the list is endless.

1.) Find work you love and live your life’s purpose. When you are uncertain, the angels can show you how to increase your confidence, be more assertive, hone in on your skills and interests. Archangel Michael’s specialty is work and life purpose.

2.) Heal chronic pain and health issues. When you have tried everything you can think of, turn to the angels. Angels give you the hope to try something new in regards to your health whether you are suffering on a mental, physical or spiritual level. They give you gentle guidance to take the next step and improve your well being. Archangel Raphael is a magnificent healer.

3.)  Find your soulmate or the love you desire.  Looking for love? The angels can tell you the areas you need to heal in order to open up and attract a partner. They also give guidance to those who are in established relationships whether it is to bring in more romance and passion or how to let go of a relationship.

4.) Heal Your Grief– The angels give you comfort and help put things into perspective in a time where everything is turned upside down. Often they have connected me and my clients with deceased loved ones (humans and animals) in order to resolve unfinished business.

5.) Children and Creativity- Angels remind you to be lighthearted and to play. They can help you with fertility and pregnancy, through all the years of your child’s development. Archangel Gabriel loves to assist with children and creative writing.

6.) A New Home- Ask for the angels help in finding a new home or selling your current one. They can help with financing to relocation issues. Once you move in, they can assist you in making your house a home.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist, certified angel card reader and Divine Channel. With over 15 years experience as a mental health counselor she gives you the encouragement, guidance and support you need to take the next step forward. If you would like an individual reading for angels or mediumship contact Lisa as she offers in person and phone readings all over the world. 

Pick up her FREE gift 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! at http://www.lisahutchison.net

 

 

 

 

 

How to Awaken Your Psychic Abilities

Empaths are naturally psychic due to the ability to tune into their own intuition and the energy surrounding them. What gets in the way of receiving clear communications are the absorption of other people’s energy and taking them on as your own. Once you learn how to protect and rejuvenate your energy, you can easily develop a connection to spirit.

Being psychic is not about doing, it is about allowing spiritual information to come to and through you. I became a Reiki Master and Certified Angel Card Reader years ago. Strange as this sounds, the recent improvement in my psychic skills did not come from formal practice or training. Today, I find the more I do my personal development work of letting go and remaining open to the moment, the stronger my connection becomes. This is what makes me a better psychic and it will make you one too.

My Psychic Journey

I often talk about my professional counselor journey and shy away from my psychic development but spirit has been confronting me to come forward now more than ever.

I had my first psychic experience at the age of five, after my Dad’s death. Since, I was  young, I did not understand what was happening and felt scared of this power to connect. My fear shut it down rather quickly.

I kept my abilities under wraps for ten years until my brother in law’s death. Being an adolescent, I was more open to spirit communication and allowed him into my life and dreams. He helped me heal and reconnect to my spiritual abilities again.

The same year, I had a crisis of faith because I felt angry with God. I left the Roman Catholic Church because of this. This breaking away allowed me to re-connect with God on a deeper level, outside the walls of a church. I found God was in everything and everyone who flowed Divine energy. At first, I felt safer connecting with the angels rather than human or animal spirits. The past couple of years, I found a re-connection to Jesus and Mother Mary by receiving their messages through meditation and Reiki sessions.

2018- A year of expansion 

I have had three experiences in the last few months with human spirits and a couple with Mother Mary which I will share.

Apparition of Mom on April 17th– My husband captured this picture of my deceased Mom sitting in my car. She appears younger than when she died. This is common with spirit appearances. Please note: there is no one physically sitting in my car and nothing is on my seat.

Mother Mary on May 6th– The night prior, I had trouble sleeping and prayed to God. About twenty minutes later, my Mother Mary alter fell off the shelf by itself. I felt startled but figured it was an answer to my prayer, picked up the picture, the other objects and fell asleep. In the morning, I turned on my salt lamp like I do every day and nothing happened. The salt lamp did not fall and was not hit because it was safe under the shelf yet the bulb inside the lamp burnt out. This is an example of how spirit uses energy to manifest.

The dream on May 21st- For an entire week, my Mom was in my dreams. Nothing special happened, but she was there as if we were living life. I enjoyed being with her as if her physical death never happened.

On the 21st, in between Mom dreams, I had another dream. I was in a support group talking about my first psychic experience after my Dad’s death. As I spoke, a shadow of a man wrapped his arms around me and I froze. I remembered this is the reaction I had in an initial dream after my Dad died. I relaxed in this dream and a mist appeared, it was my Dad’s face. I was directed by spirit to share this dream on social media, which I did. Those Mom dreams prior helped me relax enough to “see” and since my Mom’s apparition appeared in my car, this ability is strengthening.

Apparition of Dad on June 12th –On a recent vacation, I was drawn to make an unscheduled stop at the National Shrine Basilica of Our Lady of Fatima. While I was there, I read about the children who saw Mary’s apparition. This reminded me of seeing my Mom’s apparition on April 17th. I then heard, “there will be more apparitions.” I didn’t expect it to be the next day! 

While my husband and I ate lunch at a diner, a man walked in who looked like my Dad. I stared at him because his face looked like mine and some of our relatives. It has been almost four decades since I had seen him. After feeling shocked, I went to look for this man throughout the restaurant and could not find him.

When we left, I asked my Dad for a sign from heaven and asked, “Was it really you?” I got three signs. Within a couple of minutes of leaving the restaurant, we saw a truck which read Mosquito Joe. His name is Joe. On the side of the truck it said, “Haven’t seen you outside in a while.” I felt a warm sensation and made a joke, “That is true it has been 39 years!”

Thanks for being a part of this journey with me. If you would like an angel card or mediumship reading in person or by phone email me to set up your appointment.  I am also available for counseling/coaching sessions to support and guide your spiritual, psychological, mental and emotional work through Lisa Hutchison LMHC.

Take advantage of my FREE gift 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos From Your Life Now! at http//:www.lisahutchison.net

 

3 Ways to Clear Emotional Burdens for Good

 

For most of my life, I felt burdened by responsibility. Being an empath, I was born sensitive to other people’s feelings and moods. When I saw someone struggling, I felt their struggle and dived in to help. In addition to this, I was taught as a child I could make my stepfather happy by changing my behavior.

This tuning into others’ moods created an unhealthy sense of responsibility in me. As I grew up, I was depleted of energy and became ill because I gave too much. I began to set boundaries refusing to do for others what they could do for themselves. Despite withdrawing physical support, I continued to carry an emotional support.

Even though, I was mindful of what I invested my physical time in, I caught myself putting energy into thinking about others too much. I worried, prayed and tried to come up with a solution for them. I knew I was caring too much when this emotional burden expressed itself as digestive disorders, sleep problems and a tension in my shoulders and upper back.

Here is how I cleared this emotional responsibility and you can too:

1. Be aware and acknowledge– Recognize this responsibility is not mine to carry. I began to see some of the frustration I felt was the other party who was upset when I didn’t do their work for them or give them the emotional attention they wanted. Once I became aware of this, I chose to let it go.

2. Accept others who lack integrity for who they are. Integrity means a lot to me. It is about keeping your word, following through and doing what you say. This energy builds trust in relationships. The healthy empath has integrity and can see through the facade to the true character of a person.

I am not saying people who lack integrity can’t change. When you see a pattern which represents a lack of integrity, pay attention and change your behavior. This lack of integrity energy is more intense in the world now because there are a lot of people not doing their spiritual work. This is not a judgment but rather a fact. I have made a personal decision to no longer take on their energy at an emotional level because the cost is too high for me.

3. Don’t contribute and allow for space– You have to learn how to let go of control and trust the process. Remember, this is not your problem to fix. Every person is capable of finding his or her own solution. You can offer counseling, guidance and then set your boundaries.

Do less physically and emotionally in relationships no matter how uncomfortable it is for you. Often this is easier said than done. Keep practicing. This can mean not stepping in to remind a capable adult to follow through. A missed call or late appointment can happen to anyone. The first time, I assume something went wrong which was out of the person’s control. After the 2nd and 3rd time, it is a pattern and a part of the person’s character. To continue to remind and rescue others, robs them of learning how to have integrity and drains you of precious energy.

To wrap it all up

Do an honest assessment. Are you a part of the problem or the solution? Enabling and doing for others what they can do for themselves stops your and their spiritual growth. Sometimes there is no solution if the other person refuses to change. You can find peace for yourself. In the end, you are only responsible for yourself and your own energy.

Here is another blog about caring too much which can help you:

What helpers like you need to know about burnout

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. She works with professionals who often get drained from their helping efforts, giving them the tools to recharge and replenish their energy. Get her FREE gift 8 Simple Things You Can Do That Release Chaos Now! at http://www.lisahutchison.net 

Secrets- The good, the bad and the ugly

When I was a teenager, I discovered a secret was kept from me. I found out and thought I could no longer trust those closest to me. The secret was revealed, talked about and processed. I forgot all about it until a recent dream and professional experience.

Empaths- the human lie detector

Due to your sensitivity, you are able to pick up on subtle to non-existent cues and know when someone is lying. Empaths are sometimes referred to as the human lie detector for this reason. Often you know something isn’t right, yet you don’t know what it is for sure.  For this reason, it is essential to trust your instincts and learn how to assert yourself.

You do not need to become a sleuth. If the Divine wants you to know something, it will be revealed to you. When you receive hidden information, sit with it and ask for Divine guidance about your next step. The biggest mistake I see my empath clients make is reacting and later regretting it.

Why do people keep secrets?

The reason people have for keeping secrets varies from the good, the bad, to the ugly. As a psychotherapist, I abide by confidentiality. Some would say I and those in my profession keep secrets. In a way, we do. There are many instances clients have shared information with me they would never share with their families or even friends. There are exceptions to this secret keeping in therapy, such as if a person is going to harm themselves or others and in cases of abuse or neglect.

Some people keep a secret because they believe it is protecting others. They rationalize that others could not handle the information because they are too fragile. This is ironic because it is often the secret keeper who cannot handle the other person knowing.

Others believe they are helping by not sharing certain information with you. They think you don’t need to know and would not benefit from knowing. This control of the message takes the decision out of your hands and keeps it with the secret keeper. Then there are those that withhold because they are afraid of another’s reaction. Some people are more deceptive and enjoying holding power of others. They know this is information you could use yet purposely keep it hidden.

Clinically and personally, I know for a fact the reason a person keeps a secret is never personal. It is a reflection of the person keeping the secret.

The damage secrets bring:

Secrets cause division – When a secret is kept it divides people into two camps; those who know and those who do not. Even the best secret keepers can leak out information non- verbally, which a sensitive person can pick up on.

Secrets destroy trust – You cannot have a healthy relationship without trust. An energy of suspicion, hangs in the air after a secret is unearthed. It leaves people with the thought; If you kept this a secret, what else are you keeping from me?

To Wrap It All Up

There is a saying you are only as sick as your secrets. If you are keeping information from someone, why? In this age of over sharing, there are parts of life that everybody does not need to know about you. In this case, it is more a matter of privacy. The question to ask is does this information hurt others or myself or does it help others and myself heal?

Lisa Hutchison LMHC- Licensed Psychotherapist and Writing Coach for Empaths & Artists. Keeping secrets are one of the many ways your energy gets depleted. Lisa works with professionals who often get drained from their helping efforts, recharge and rejuvenate their energy. Get her FREE gift 8 Simple Things that Release Chaos Now!  http://www.lisahutchison.net 

How Trauma Gets in the Way of Relationship Success

 

Under stress, the human mind is vulnerable to unresolved trauma. When you or someone you know feels reminded of a traumatic event, you either freeze (become detached), fight (verbally or physically) or take flight (avoid and leave). Often you don’t know what happened inside of your own mind or someone else’s; what you see is a change in behavior which causes your relationship to suffer.

What is a trigger? 

A trigger is something that someone says or does that reminds your subconscious mind of a past trauma. Some people experience flashbacks or a reliving of the event after being triggered. These flashbacks happen a lot for people who have post traumatic stress.

Trauma Reactions

You can experience a trauma reaction from war, sexual assault, death, or any type of abusive relationship in which you felt your life was or is in danger.  Being a witness to other’s experiencing trauma can be traumatizing for some people. Empaths may be more susceptible to trauma reactions because of their sensitivity.

An example

Veterans who hear fireworks may feel as if they are back in the war. In that moment and time, their mind is occupied with a trauma image. As a result, they appear tense, angry, anxious or detached from the present moment.

When you do not heal past trauma it continues to be an energy that gets expressed. It often comes out in one of these three ways in relationships. 

3 Trauma Behaviors that Cause Relationship Difficulty 

Chaos-  Your relationships are unstable and chaotic. This energy is acted out and seen as dramatic arguments in relationships. For others who repress chaos within, the energy causes illness and chronic pain. Since your mind is overstimulated, you find it hard to focus and are easily distracted, similar to people who experience attention deficit disorders. You may turn to substances or have addictions.

Avoidance–  You feel fearful, overwhelmed or frozen. Another reason why you avoid is due to feeling numb. When you cut yourself off from feeling, you disconnect from the painful traumatic emotions but also the happy, pleasurable emotions of life. Since you find no joy in life, you stop maintaining connections. If you are in a relationship, you appear detached and don’t know why you can’t connect with others even when you are together. You may turn to substances and have addictions.

Over-reactive to life – You feel angry. You and others notice you have a short fuse and react impulsively. You feel jumpy and on edge because your brain believes it is under a threat, in psychology this is known as hypervigilance. This super reactivity is good in times of crisis, it is not useful in everyday life. Your outbursts can lead to arrests and legal difficulties. You may turn to substances and have addictions.

To Wrap It All Up

If you are experiencing these trauma behaviors you and your relationships do not need to suffer, seek out a qualified therapist who works with trauma. The good news is, trauma can be healed and you can have successful relationships.

Remember everyone is coming from their own perception and experiences. When someone is overly reactive, avoiding you or stuck in their own drama, it is not personal. It may be a sign of past unresolved trauma they have not healed yet.

Some people stay in these reactions their entire lives while others seek therapy. My advice to you is lovingly detach from them and heal your own wounds. With time and space, you will know how to respond to these types of relationships.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Unresolved trauma is one of the many ways your energy becomes depleted overtime. Lisa specializes in working for professionals who often get drained from their helping efforts, refill and rejuvenate their energies, Visit www.lisahutchison.net and get  FREE – 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now! 

How to do the Letting Go Part of Grief

I find myself facing the transitory nature of life again. In 2016-2017, I had two friends die. Last month in February, another one joined the light. I am in a mixed state of denial, shock and intermittent sadness. You would think it gets easier to grieve when you have had a lot of practice with it such as myself, it doesn’t. Each grief experience is unique and takes you into the depths of your being. A part of yourself dies because you no longer have that shared physical experience and memory of being together.

Life is all about holding on and letting go

I have found the letting go part scary and at times I have not been very good at it. I want to recreate and sit with the memories a little bit longer. I read old texts, emails and look at photos in an effort to grab a hold of that old connection once more. Then the realization sweeps over me and the pain of the loss sets in.

I reach out but find I can’t make or control certain family members to care more. I try to force a square peg into a round hole and find myself tense up when it does not work according to my plan. I want to assure you, this is normal in the beginning stages of grief. Be patient and gentle with yourself as you adjust to a new reality. Overtime, this tensing up and holding on can translate into body pains, sleep difficulties and irritability. This is when you need to let go…

 Tips to let go

1.) Awareness– Know your own signs of holding on too tight. Are you are an obsessive thinker or doer? Learn your body signals and see where you resist letting go. A couple of days after the loss of my friend, I received a message from spirit telling me; “Relax, you don’t always have to be going someplace.”

2.) Don’t think about it, just do it – Choose to let go and take a leap of faith. Do not intellectualize the letting go. Rather than focusing on how to do it, be present with releasing. Start by surrendering to your breath. Breathe in and state, “I am calm.” Breath out and state, “I let go.” You will need to practice letting go many times as it is not a natural process for most people.

3.) Remind yourself, it is safe to let go. Often our fears make letting go worse than the reality is. Believe and trust you are safe. You may need to tell yourself, “I am safe or it is safe to let go now.”

4.) Remember how letting go can feel positive. When you have fully healed and let go, you are left with a feeling of joy, release and freedom. Think back to when you were a child and rode a bike unassisted or stood up on ice skates to move on your own.

In letting go, you trust and release the emotional pain. What remains is the love, memories and spiritual connection. Now you are open to a new way of living. If you need more help through the grieving process check out these blogs:

Coping with the unexpected death of a friend  (grief, sudden loss, friend, PTSD, complicated grief, empath)

5 Powerful Ways of Finding Freedom from Empathic Guilt (petloss, guilt, empath)

This blog is dedicated to my friend Gary who would have been 63 years old today when this blog was published on March 6th. He died from a courageous battle with esophageal cancer on February 3, 2018. Thank you Gary for shining your light upon my life.

Lisa Hutchison LMHC is a licensed psychotherapist and writing coach for empaths and artists. Unresolved grief or loss is one of the many ways your energy becomes depleted overtime. Lisa specializes in working with professionals who get drained from their helping/caring efforts, refill and recharge their energy.  Visit her website and get a FREE gift- 8 Simple Things That Release Chaos from Your Life Now! at www.lisahutchison.net